Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Na Night

So I just ravaged the packaging of an Unisom trying to get it out... I need some sleep, man!!! Every night I feel like a superstitious athlete with his lucky socks and sacred before performance rituals..."Ok... last night he slept really good, and we had just given him a bath, he wore these jammies, and he was swaddled with one arm out... so maybe if I just repeat that exact same thing..." it's pretty crazy. The sad thing is, even when my newborn gives me a four or five hour stretch-- my mind just keeps on churning out the same paranoias... "What if I trip and drop him because I'm so tired? Is it way hot in here?...nope, just detoxing those pregnancy hormones... oh... my gosh, did he poop again?? That's it... only ONE change per feeding next time, little guy...ok?" PLEEAASE!

Other than the sleep thing and the fact that I don't really know how I can ever leave my house with two babies all by myself, I'm great. All throughout my day I think of that Duggar lady with 18 kids and think... "Wow, I need to watch that show- how do they do it?" I love the comment I got from this darling girl Meagan at church, "So two now, huh? It's less boring, isn't it?" I loved that perspective... from now on, anything challenging to me is going to be "less boring"...

Isaiah is doing really well. He's super cute with his eagle skwaks/teradactle calls. Thank heavens he's a good nurser and for magical boobs. Did I just write that? Whell, honetly that's what I think when he's screaming and then suddenly, pop him on and...ah.. silence.. Golden.. just golden. But come on, mommies, admit it, you're a bit proud when you squirt your baby in the eyeball that first time, or after you pump a bunch and your like, "how many ounces was that? i'm a amazing!" Maybe men are right to be so obsessed with these wonderous things! I guess it's kind of like when guys are pyromaniacs... maybe we're lactomaniacs... "Honey, did you just throw out that last half ounce he didn't drink... we could save that!" I'm really trying to calm down, I promise... But I'm so grateful that I'm able to nurse... I'm way to lazy to have MORE dishes, and to get up and get them ready... blah, blah... I'm so grateful I can do it now without thinking profanities anymore... those first few weeks are brutal! Ah.... the delirium of new mommyhood... I might have to delete this post when I read it in the light of day... oops...